X-Ray a.ka. Hospital Massacre (1981)

Ah, Valentine's Day... The day you wait all year for to show your significant other you give a shit about them. Forget the other 364 days, you only have to do something nice this one time and then you can go back to be a slob for another year. Or you could kill your sweetheart's childhood crush, go to med school and become a doctor, then stalk her again as an adult with the intent of removing her heart for some odd reason. At least that's the killer's plan in the mediocre 1981 Barbi Benton vehicle X-Ray (aka Hospital Massacre). We're not sure of the details, but we think Barbi Benton wanted to try her hand at acting after her stint as a Playboy Bunny and girlfriend to Hugh Hefner (before he transformed into the Crypt Keeper), and Cannon Films was more than happy to oblige her. The ironic part is that Barbi is fully-clothed through the vast majority of this snoozefest, and spends her screen time scowling at literally everyone. Who did the wheezing killer better, X-Ray or Student Bodies? Find out this week on Horror Movie Night! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices