Rock memoirs that need to be written, the Porridge Christmas Special and Hunky Dory’s 50th birthday

In which we salute the comic genius of Ronnie “Fletcher” Barker and Fulton “Mackay” Mackay, fantasise about autobiographies still to come (Neil Tennant, Pet Clark, John Paul Jones, Noel Gallagher), are mildly appalled by the new My Sweet Lord video and play two bracing rounds of Spot the Genuine Christmas single (Beck’s Little Drum-Machine Boy? Half Man Half Biscuit’s Deck The Halls With Buddy Holly?). Gary Chrimble to all, and a gear New Year!

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