You’re Praising Your Child — But Are You Praising the Right Thing? Matthew and Audra Karam on What the Research Actually Shows

Most parents praise their kids constantly — and most of them are accidentally doing it in a way that builds a fixed mindset instead of a resilient one. A landmark Stanford University study found that children praised for their performance — their grades, their talent, their results — develop a fear of failure and become less willing to take on challenges. Children praised for their effort, on the other hand, build resilience, embrace difficulty, and develop the growth mindset that predicts long-term success far better than natural ability ever does. Matthew and Audra Karam join Stacey Chillemi to break down exactly what that distinction looks like in real parenting moments — the specific language that builds emotional resilience versus the language that quietly undermines it, how positive reinforcement and strength-based communication change a child’s relationship to struggle, and why the way you respond to your child’s effort today is shaping how they will handle failure as an adult. What they share about the role parents play as a child’s first and most important teacher — and how small shifts in the words you choose can have an outsized impact on who your child becomes — will make you think twice the next time you open your mouth to say “good job.” The praise is not the problem. This episode is about making it work. Website: LEARNINGS: What is the number one indicator of success for children? The number one indicator of success for children is resilience and grit. How can parents help their children develop resilience and grit? Parents can help their children develop resilience and grit by rewarding effort instead of just performance, allowing them to learn from failure, and supporting their internal self-confidence. What is a suggested way to praise a child? A suggested way to praise a child is to mirror their hard work, recognize their efforts, and let others know about it. This will make the child feel valued and encouraged. What website is mentioned in the podcast where parents can find character and leadership resources? The website mentioned in the podcast where parents can find character and leadership resources is . How can parents improve their communication and consistency in parenting? Parents can improve their communication and consistency in parenting by setting clear expectations, explaining the reasons behind rules, and ensuring both parents are on the same page to avoid manipulation by children. Sponsored By: Happy Wellness Expo - Over 100 National and Local Exhibitors Top Quality Products and Services For Your Health and Well-Being! Saturday, March 23rd, 2024 - 10 AM - 7 PM Website: https://happywellnessexpo.com Call: 973-420-2333 Become a supporter of this podcast: . Follow The Advisor with Stacey Chillemi for weekly episodes on mindset, wellness, spirituality, and business growth—without burnout. Newsletter & resources: https://substack.com/@staceychillemi Watch & connect: • • Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices