Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery

We’ve just been invited to an eccentric billionaire’s island home, and you know what that means: vacation time! Grab your trunks, your sunscreen, and ninety-nine bottles of beer to be appended to the wall and distributed communally one by one over the course of the trip because we are paradise bound! We’ll probably be drunk by the time we get there because that’s a lot of alcohol, but, after a greasy burger sees to your hangover, you should get out there and enjoy the island’s amenities! Gaze in wonder at the Bond villain-esque architecture (get it? ‘Cuz Daniel Craig? James Bond? Is this thing on?), laugh along with the eclectic collection of narcissists and jerkwads that have joined us on this heavenly retreat and . . . gasp! What’s that? Someone’s been murdered? Heavens to Betsy, someone call Colonel Sanders’ third cousin because this is a job for Benoit Blanc! That’s right folks, after Knives Out was showered with stars, A’s, and thumbs ups (to say nothing of cold hard cash), another adventure with the rootin-est tootin-est detective to ever smoke a cigar was inevitable. Hence Glass Onion, the 2022 who-dun-it directed by Rian Johnson following up on his surprise hit. Glass Onion is doing pretty well for itself critically at the moment, and since we’ve seen it recently the Magellans thought they would contribute to the cultural discourse by weighing in on this tropical thriller and doubtlessly end the conversation with their world-renowned wit. The game’s afoot!