Welcome To IHOP, I'll Be Your Lesbian Predator

On Today’s Show: Mourning the loss of another beloved U-tard: King Cobra JFS has passed away A religious drummer goes rogue and turns praise music into a personal drum solo A hot dog–costumed woman takes revenge with toilet paper An IHOP waitress moonlights as a lesbian predator on the job Episode Sponsor: Thanks to Haley’s Comet for sponsoring today’s stupidity and praising DV’s commitment to hard-hitting “porn news journalism.” Want to sponsor? Just $25 via PayPal at [email protected] . Tim revisits Pure Hypochondria , marking its one-year anniversary—stream it on Spotify, Apple Music, and beyond. Opening track: Semen Latte , inspired by Pastor Manning’s Starbucks rant and a true DV classic. DV pays tribute to the legendary YouTuber known for his drunken mead-making, Taco Bell devotion, and bizarre live streams. Audio highlights include Cobra’s “deathbed” complaints, Taco Bell philosophy, and his ill-fated relationship with Jessica Messica. Cause of death? Possibly bad homemade booze… or just Cobra being Cobra. Corey Feldman mangles Stand By Me with Jerry O’Connell. A church band’s drummer hijacks worship to bang for Christ like Animal from The Muppets . Body cam footage captures two unruly women who insist “you’re not going to arrest us.” Spoiler: they are arrested. One claims to be an Attorney General, demands body cams be shut off, flees, cries, then demon-screams. Fallout: Rhode Island’s AG office suspends her without pay for the outburst. IHOP Predator: A waitress in St. Petersburg harasses and gropes a 51-year-old woman mid-pancake run. Hot Dog Revenge: A drunk woman in a wiener suit vandalizes her neighbor’s car with toilet paper. Freak commentary on slow-witted stadium workers, Gary Puckett’s creepy collab dreams with Mead Skelton, and Unicorn Hamster scouting Sniffies hookups. Tim reminisces about childhood cereals: Cookie Crisp, Smurf Berry, PB Cap’n Crunch, and more. Support DV and get exclusive shows all week: Monday & Wednesday: Bonus segment shows Tuesday & Thursday: Full-length exclusive episodes Just $9/month (less with longer plans). Sign up at DistortedView.com , Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Patreon. Closing Thought: “You’re not going to arrest us.” — Every drunk woman ever, right before being handcuffed. 🎶 Musical Oddities🪦 RIP King Cobra JFS🎤 Cringe Performances🚔 Cop Cam Chaos🍳 Florida Follies📞 Listener Voicemails📢 Join The Sideshow