Jizz Jockey Crowned “Nut King” At The World’s First Sperm Derby

On Today’s Show: 💩 Eating dog and cat poop on livestream — can this man really make scat content profitable? 🏁 The world's first sperm race is here: meet the Nut King, the jizz jockeys, and the cum-tastic champion, Tristan Milker. 🎨 An actual 19th-century condom engraved with clergy gangbang art is on display in the Netherlands. Safe sex, but make it baroque. 🚫 Idaho declares a truck nut emergency and bans novelty genitals from the backs of vehicles. 🐍 Man’s penis viciously attacked by a python lurking in his toilet. Because Thailand. 👮‍♀️ Plus: a woman begs for goldfish crackers and her Miranda rights while being arrested in her mom’s front yard. 🧠 Also in this episode: Tim launches Distorted View: Tim’s Version — a re-recording of early, cringey episodes with a fresh twist for the Crude Summer series. Podcasting pioneers don’t take breaks, they take revenge on their back catalog. We review a live poop-eating challenge so you never have to. You're welcome. 00:00:00 Final Days For Sideshow Membership Deals! 00:51:12 Introduction 02:02:18 I'm Taylor Swifting My Worst Shows 06:26:02 The Eating Dog Shit Challenge Livestream Craptacular 12:15:22 The Cat Shit Mukbang Livestream 18:43:12 Footage From The Wold's First Sperm Race 22:06:15 Accidentally Barred From Entering Your Mom's House 27:29:09 Sign Up For The Sideshow! 29:27:05 Historical Condom On Display 34:33:21 The War On Truck Nuts Has Begun 38:51:21 Python Attached To The Tip Of A Penis 42:38:20 Voicemails: 206-666-4463 / Ending