🧠 On Today’s Episode: Masturbation for Science! Tim checks to make sure his dick’s still operational. It’s all about male health and quality control, folks. ➤ “Sometimes it’s not about pleasure—it’s a systems check .” Confessions of an Old Lady Walker Tim celebrates a massive weight loss milestone (70 pounds!) and the thrill of fitting into decade-old “large” shirts again. Sadly, Lord Douche still won’t let him do laundry without internet surveillance. Air Fryer Anarchy When Lord Douche leaves town, Tim rebels by cooking salmon in the air fryer. Somewhere in Florida, a man screams. Becoming a Cripple (For Fun!) A deep dive into “trans wheelchair users”—able-bodied people who identify as disabled. Tim explores their tips for faking ailments and the strange world of subliminal paraplegia playlists . Cuomo’s Comeback Disaster Former New York Governor Andrew Cuomo’s mayoral announcement goes about as well as you’d expect when the crowd’s screaming “rapist” and “homosexual.” Parking Lot Pile-Up Tim breaks down a viral confrontation between a Trump-hatted white guy and a black woman blocking two parking spots. Spoiler: everyone’s an asshole. OpenAI Gets Horny ChatGPT is finally allowed to generate erotic content for verified adults. Tim’s thrilled. “I’m going to break ChatGPT in December.” Stabby at Marshalls A woman in Kearny, New Jersey buys kitchen knives mid-argument and uses them to stab another customer over slow checkout lines. Tim sympathizes—he almost went “stabby” at Kroger himself. Timestamps: 00:00:00 Introduction 00:00:00 Wednesday Movie Matinee 00:18:14 QuantumSquares.Com Get 25% Off With Promo Code FREAK 00:38:04 Introduction 02:07:18 Today's DV Listener Sponsor: Brandon! 03:06:17 What Is your Masturbation Number? 06:27:00 Tim Henson Fit N' Lean 10:39:13 Big Douche Is Watching My Appliance Usage 15:30:04 Trans-Wheelchair User Tips And Tricks 19:48:22 Andrew Cuomo Gets Heckled 21:51:01 Parking Lot Altercation Gets Racist 26:38:01 QuantumSquares.Com - Promo Code: FREAK - 25% OFF 28:37:17 Sign Up For The Sideshow! 30:02:10 ChatGPT Will Get Real Nasty With You Soon 33:35:17 Stabbing At The Checkout Lane 38:28:10 Jordan Peterson Thanks Today's Sponsor 39:36:11 Voicemails: 206-666-4463 / Ending
