In this episode, Tera Wages sits down with Phyllis Hill and Echo Hill Vedder to talk about a game-changing concept: desire vs. capacity—the difference between what we want to do and what we actually have the bandwidth for. They discuss how ignoring our capacity leads to burnout, why so many of us push through exhaustion, and how tuning into our bodies can be the key to reclaiming energy and joy. Echo shares how she learned to listen to her body instead of the judge in her head, and Phyllis gets real about hitting empty after years of over-functioning. They explore many ways to grow capacity, shift limiting beliefs, and make space for what truly matters—without guilt or shame. Plus, they break down how emotional processing through Connection Codes helps expand capacity and disrupts the pain cycle not just for ourselves, but for our entire community. If you’re feeling exhausted, stuck, or constantly running on fumes, this episode is a must-listen! Links and Resources: Book a discovery call for Overwhelm Overhaul: https://calendly.com/tera-wages/30min To download the Core Emotion Wheel: https://connectioncodes.co/wheel To enroll in Foundations use the code PODCAST for 20% off: https://connectioncodes.co/marriage-course-online Book a coaching session with Dr. Glenn: https://connectioncodes.co/marriage-help (If links are not working, please copy and paste connectioncodes.co to your search bar and look through our site menu!) _________________________________________________________________ Connect with Echo Hill Vetter: Echo Hill Vetter’s Substack | Letters from Nashville: https://substack.com/@echohillvetter Echo on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/echohillvetter Schedule 1:1 Coaching or Group Coaching with Echo: https://calendly.com/echohillvetter Echo’s LinkTree: https://linktr.ee/echohillvetter Chapters 00:00:00 - The Tug-of-War Between Wanting and Doing 00:04:10 - A Room Full of Connection Code Coaches 00:05:11 - When Your To-Do List Laughs at You 00:08:48 - Burnout Doesn’t Knock—It Kicks the Door Down 00:11:58 - Your Body is Keeping Score (And It’s Not Looking Good) 00:16:33 - Why Some Days You Can Handle It, and Some Days You Can’t 00:22:48 - The Science of Saying No (And Actually Meaning It) 00:26:57 - The Invisible Cost of Always Saying Yes 00:31:37 - The Brain vs. The Body: Who Wins? 00:32:34 - When Life Demands More Than You Can Give 00:34:38 - SOS: Finding Help Before You Collapse 00:36:36 - Systems That Save You From Yourself 00:42:56 - Self-Care Isn’t a Luxury—It’s Survival 00:48:07 - Why Emotional Processing is the Secret to More Energy 00:54:33 - Final Thoughts From Three People Who’ve Been There
