Gen Z Dating Behavior: This Is Crazy?!

Dive into the wild world of Gen Z dating with Malcolm and Simone Collins on Based Camp! In this eye-opening episode, we dissect a Substack post by steph on Miami’s pickup artist scene, where young men armed with Meta Ray-Ban glasses and cheesy lines are turning cold approaches into content gold. From “friction maxing” to stave off AI-induced cognitive decline, to women stealing Sweetgreen salads and buying drinks for strangers in NYC—dating has never been weirder.

We share practical tips, debunk red pill myths, explore why pickup isn’t really about women anymore, and reveal what romance novels teach us about ideal meet-cutes. Plus, Malcolm’s honest (and effective) pickup strategies from his single days. Whether you’re navigating apps, IRL encounters, or just curious about cultural shifts, this episode is packed with laughs, insights, and warnings for the future of romance. Don’t miss our thoughts on why colleges might still be the best spot for real connections!

Episode Notes

This was inspired by “gen z pick up artists are taking over my city” by a gen z substacker who goes by steph

Choice quotes from the article:

* Erick Ronaldo is one of the many Miami pickup creators making a killing in this market. He’s racked up over 1.3 million Instagram followers teaching young men how to “get dates with 8s and 9s.” For $17 a month, guys can sign up for his Modern Man Bootcamp, which includes three weekly coaching sessions and access to his personal arsenal of pickup lines.

* … “It’s no issue that his flirting techniques sound like they were cooked up by Mickey Mouse. Men don’t follow Erick for his AI-generated rizz — they’re there to watch his aspirational displays of hyper-confident masculinity. “Guys like watching other guys pick up girls because they don’t have the balls to do it themselves,” according to Polokidd, a fellow Miami pickup influencer with 1.6 million followers.”

FRICTION MAXXING:

“Ben, a 27-year-old living in Miami’s particularly flirty neighborhood of Brickell, told me he prefers cold approaching not only because it’s more efficient than waiting around for responses on the apps, but because it’s a great exercise in friction-maxxing. “I mean, you can’t ask ChatGPT to help with a response,” he explained. “You just gotta be yourself and see if she’s into you or not. There’s no better way to improve yourself and stand out as a man, too.””

Note: The term appears to have been coined and popularized by By Kathryn Jezer-Morton, a columnist for The Cut covering modern family life, who wrote an article in January titled: In 2026, We Are Friction-Maxxing: https://archive.is/l5KXr

WOMEN WANT IT (sort of)

“Do women even want to be asked out by a total stranger?

It seems that for most, the answer is YESomgpleaseGODplease* but with some very crucial caveats.

Although there’s no shortage of eager men lurking on the apps and in their DMs, Gen Z women are quite loudly yearning for IRL meet-cutes. The girls are out here stealing Sweetgreen salads, buying men drinks, even doing laps at run clubs — all for a shot at retiring from the humiliation ritual that is online dating in 2026. At this point, landing a response to how’d you two meet? that doesn’t start with a like or swipe is the reigning status symbol of our time.

Alexis, a 24-year-old Miami native, told me she recently deleted all the dating apps in hopes her next boyfriend will come and find her in the wild. While she’s all for men shooting their shot, she does really wish they would work on their aim a bit first.

“I would love to be asked out in person, but not how these Miami guys are doing it,” she says. “It’d be cool if he saw me at a coffee shop and asked what book I’m reading. Maybe he drops a note at my table. I don’t know, I just want the interaction to be genuine. These guys always manage to turn me off.””

This is why men should be reading romance novels and not following pick-up artists.

Or perhaps they can ask AI for a list of all the ways the female protagonists in the top 100 romance novels met their male love interests.

E.g. from Perplexity

High‑frequency “meet” patterns

* Workplace (colleagues, boss/employee, client, rival professional, bodyguard).​

* Friends to lovers (childhood friends, college friends, long‑time colleagues).​

* Enemies/rivals to lovers (professional rivals, family enemies, legal opponents, competing businesses).​

* Forced proximity (stuck in a cabin, snowstorm, road trip, only one hotel room, trapped together on assignment).

* One‑night stand / fling that turns serious, often followed by a surprise pregnancy or reunion.​

* Fake relationship (pretend dating, fake engagement or marriage for social, work, or immigration reasons).​

* Marriage before romance (arranged marriage, marriage of convenience, Vegas/drunk marriage).​

* Best friend’s sibling / sibling’s best friend (meets through family or long acquaintance).​

* Neighbor or new arrival to town (next‑door neighbor, new person in small town, landlord/tenant).​

* Guardian / protector setups (bodyguard, security detail, assigned protector, cop/detective on her case).

* Rescue or crisis (he helps her after an accident, threat, robbery, or during war/disaster).

* Mistaken identity / secret identity (thinks he’s someone else; he’s undercover, royal, or billionaire in disguise).​

* Online or anonymous contact (dating apps, chatrooms, email, texting, online gaming).​

* Teacher/student in adult‑appropriate contexts (grad student and advisor, coach and adult athlete, mentor and trainee).

* Reunions/second chance (exes who cross paths again, high‑school sweethearts, war‑separated lovers).

* Family or wedding events (meet at weddings, engagement parties, reunions, as bridal party members).​

* Travel / vacation (seatmates on planes, tour groups, destination weddings, stranded abroad).

* Shared project / mission (heist crew, investigative partners, saving a business, political campaign, joint research).​

* Sports and performance (teammate, coach, rival athlete, trainer, or someone tied to the sports world).

* Medical or therapy setting (doctor/patient’s relative, physical therapist, trauma counselor, combat medic).

* Supernatural / fantasy bond (fated mates, magical contracts, captor/guard in fantasy kingdoms, paranormal protector).

Typical “how they first meet” scenes

* Accidental collision in daily life (literal bump‑in, spilled coffee, dropped papers, bookstore/library run‑ins).​

* She overhears or witnesses him doing something decisive or heroic (arguing a case, fighting a duel, saving someone).

* He hires her or she hires him (assistant, nanny, consultant, contractor, investigator).​

* She shows up at the wrong place or situation (wrong wedding, wrong room, mistaken meeting).​

* Forced living situation (roommates, house‑sit swap, co‑owners of property, inheritance conditions).​

* He is tied to her family (family rival, guardian, benefactor, cousin’s best friend, sibling’s ex).​

* Crisis services (she calls a tow truck, security, tech support; he’s the responder).

THIS IS NOT ABOUT MARRIA