I had a baby – then lost my memory, part 1

When Samina Ali gave birth to her first child in California in 1999, what should have been a joyful moment quickly turned into a medical emergency.

An undiagnosed case of the pregnancy disorder pre-eclampsia led to multiple organ failure, strokes, a brain haemorrhage and grand mal seizure. Within hours of delivering her son, Samina fell into a coma. When she woke five days later, she had no memory of what had happened – or of large parts of her life.

She didn’t recognise her husband, and she had no idea she had just become a mother.

Samina, who grew up between India and the United States, had built a life around language. A budding novelist, she had always turned to writing as a way to navigate a sense of dislocation between cultures. But now her ability to communicate was also affected – her English fractured, her memories gone, her sense of self profoundly altered.

As doctors tried to understand the extent of the damage, her newborn son was being treated in intensive care nearby. Meanwhile, her family responded in different ways – placing their faith in both medical treatment and long-held spiritual beliefs.

In the first part of her story, Samina describes the events surrounding the birth of her son, the severity of her illness, and what it meant to wake up without recognising her own life. In part two, she begins the long process of recovery – relearning how to live, and reconnecting with the child she could barely recognise.

Samina has written about her experience in her memoir, Pieces You’ll Never Get Back.

Presenter: Asya Fouks Producer: Maryam Maruf Editor: Munazza Khan Research: Hetal Bapodra

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